I came to this life just about as receptive to love as this stone child in the picture at left is to the divine butterfly woman mother attempting to love her.
Shortly after arriving into the womb, sweetness was poured into me, too much sweetness and not only was it not a blessing, it came into me as a poison, a substance that I could not assimilate at all, suffocating me in the dark of night.
Shortly after arriving into the womb, sweetness was poured into me, too much sweetness and not only was it not a blessing, it came into me as a poison, a substance that I could not assimilate at all, suffocating me in the dark of night.
Now I see that this very experience set up the task before me in this life, the core journey and mission , to pave the path from the depth of Fear into the height of remembered love.
The task of my life has been to recover my body, mind, spirit vehicle as a nexus point for the giving and receiving of the sweetness of love. To begin with a template where love was vehemently rejected in a reversal grid of tyranny and distortion, owned by the fear maker who inseminated his poison throughout my waking days and my sleeping nights and somehow heal this template into one that was not only permeable to love but would rise as a nexus point for the giving and receiving of love between mother and infant, lover and beloved.
So starting from within this stone in the depth of the night, I would journey across the darkness, building bridges of love in the night for these 27 years and 10 months and through great cleansing and clearing and re- configuring, this would become a vehicle that would not only be permeable to love, but be a nexus point for the giving and receiving of love, an anchor for the self generation of the upward spiral of super conductive fountaining ecstasy of communion with GOD that could serve as a transit bridge for those threatened by the damage of the code enabling their safe passage into the light.
I am understanding now that in order to embody the path from the depth of darkness and fear to the height of Remembered Love, one must live at the effect of the depth of darkness. Of course it makes perfect sense as I think of it: to serve as a transit bridge from decimated genetic code to the fully remembered code of living light as an insurance agent for GOD, enabling the deliverance of the masses on my dance card that I came to take unto the ascension timeline of love. GOD made arrangements for some key insurance agents who would anchor an intact path from the bowels of darkness into the heights of remembered love so that
Even in the depth of night of "final conflict" even those with the most damaged code would be provided safe passage!,
Those of us that serve as transit bridges, would have to be able to have within our DNA, plug-in points even for the most fear-entrenched disintegrated code. In that way, we would be able to serve as in a sense, "universal chargers" no matter how dead the battery, ensuring that the most possible beloved human family has a passage home should the code be deeply damaged.
The task of my life has been to recover my body, mind, spirit vehicle as a nexus point for the giving and receiving of the sweetness of love. To begin with a template where love was vehemently rejected in a reversal grid of tyranny and distortion, owned by the fear maker who inseminated his poison throughout my waking days and my sleeping nights and somehow heal this template into one that was not only permeable to love but would rise as a nexus point for the giving and receiving of love between mother and infant, lover and beloved.
So starting from within this stone in the depth of the night, I would journey across the darkness, building bridges of love in the night for these 27 years and 10 months and through great cleansing and clearing and re- configuring, this would become a vehicle that would not only be permeable to love, but be a nexus point for the giving and receiving of love, an anchor for the self generation of the upward spiral of super conductive fountaining ecstasy of communion with GOD that could serve as a transit bridge for those threatened by the damage of the code enabling their safe passage into the light.
I am understanding now that in order to embody the path from the depth of darkness and fear to the height of Remembered Love, one must live at the effect of the depth of darkness. Of course it makes perfect sense as I think of it: to serve as a transit bridge from decimated genetic code to the fully remembered code of living light as an insurance agent for GOD, enabling the deliverance of the masses on my dance card that I came to take unto the ascension timeline of love. GOD made arrangements for some key insurance agents who would anchor an intact path from the bowels of darkness into the heights of remembered love so that
Even in the depth of night of "final conflict" even those with the most damaged code would be provided safe passage!,
Those of us that serve as transit bridges, would have to be able to have within our DNA, plug-in points even for the most fear-entrenched disintegrated code. In that way, we would be able to serve as in a sense, "universal chargers" no matter how dead the battery, ensuring that the most possible beloved human family has a passage home should the code be deeply damaged.
Anyway, getting back to the poisoning. On august 22nd, for some reason and
looking back I see it was a part of my healing to repeat history with my mama in the house of my birth but on the night of August 22nd, I dumped toxic sweetness into my blood stream once again. She ordered the Chocolate Lava cake from Islands and I went to pick it up. There could be no mistake, this was a parnership operation. We microwaved the brownie so the chocolate was slightly melted, then dished up the ice cream with hot fudge sauce and nuts. It was split 3 ways between my mom, dad and me. The suffocation did not begin until I went to bed. There, I felt my body chemistry in danger as I lived through horrendously anguishing and terrifying spasms of suffocation all through one horrible night and was hung over in dispair and weakness the whole of the next day.
The next day, August 24th, I was scheduled to fly to San Francisco for some sweet visiting time with a new friend. It all felt so wrong to feel so bad. So on the night of August 23rd as I laid down to sleep, I said a prayer. "Please, let love come to me. please let love heal me. Please let my life be lifted from the dungeon of anguish and suffering into the new day of joy, love and well being, of strength and sunshine and celebration. I want to go to visit my friend tomorrow and be smiling and well. She is a new friend, and I want to be alive and well with her and able to experience joy.
Then I slept....
looking back I see it was a part of my healing to repeat history with my mama in the house of my birth but on the night of August 22nd, I dumped toxic sweetness into my blood stream once again. She ordered the Chocolate Lava cake from Islands and I went to pick it up. There could be no mistake, this was a parnership operation. We microwaved the brownie so the chocolate was slightly melted, then dished up the ice cream with hot fudge sauce and nuts. It was split 3 ways between my mom, dad and me. The suffocation did not begin until I went to bed. There, I felt my body chemistry in danger as I lived through horrendously anguishing and terrifying spasms of suffocation all through one horrible night and was hung over in dispair and weakness the whole of the next day.
The next day, August 24th, I was scheduled to fly to San Francisco for some sweet visiting time with a new friend. It all felt so wrong to feel so bad. So on the night of August 23rd as I laid down to sleep, I said a prayer. "Please, let love come to me. please let love heal me. Please let my life be lifted from the dungeon of anguish and suffering into the new day of joy, love and well being, of strength and sunshine and celebration. I want to go to visit my friend tomorrow and be smiling and well. She is a new friend, and I want to be alive and well with her and able to experience joy.
Then I slept....
While the body slept this great love began to come surrounding my mid section where I was most hurting and suffocating, It came like a sun, like a flower of immense abundance, pouring Golden light into me. It came re-instructing my cells that I was a being of light, that I was re-membered in the great web of love, that I was a child of the sun, no longer trapped in a night of suffocation and torture, and the newly wounded territory of my adrenals were ripe to hear the message this time and to truly be lifted, healed and made new again.
And whnen I woke in the morning, a new probable future had been opened for me. A day and a visit with my friend in the sunshine of celebration and wellness. I was able to breathe and walk and smile and I went to the airport, got on that plane and did go and did celebrate with my new friend. We sang. We walked in San Francisco. We went to the Peace Arts Cafe. I shared music with her and her husband and it was so good to be in the light.
And whnen I woke in the morning, a new probable future had been opened for me. A day and a visit with my friend in the sunshine of celebration and wellness. I was able to breathe and walk and smile and I went to the airport, got on that plane and did go and did celebrate with my new friend. We sang. We walked in San Francisco. We went to the Peace Arts Cafe. I shared music with her and her husband and it was so good to be in the light.
So I wanted to take this time to report the miracle of this shifting of gears from suffering to celebration.
These times are so amazing. More than ever, we can shape and sculpt and change our reality by our will to receive the good even if we have been suffering for a very long time. The sun is right there for us, if we can just turn our intentions toward letting it reach us.
May we continue to reach with our precious hearts and our precious arms into the dawning sunlight of love and gratitude.
May we continue to reach with our precious hearts and our precious arms into the dawning sunlight of love and gratitude.
Love to all in my human family and the family of all of life. May we continue to reach with our precious hearts and our precious arms into the dawning sunlight of love and gratitude. Even as chaos and downward spiraling mental bodies all around us come undone, we can anchor ourselves in love and gratitude, in the simplicity of appreciation for the beauty within and without. We can look into each other's eyes and see the dawning sun of our impending return to unity and feel how much we love each other. In this appreciation we rise onto the upward spiral , above the descending chaos and hold ourselves steady in this light. Not only this, as more and more of the mental structures come undone,
Int his time of the undoing of the mental body of tyranny, the way to ecstasy becomes clearer than it has ever been if we can but get our precious sweet feet poised upon the path.
We are holding hands, beloved. Every moment you spend in gratitude and appreciation, I am lifted and we are all lifted until the ground under our spiraling ecstatic feet is the only ground there is, dancing, singing, feasting and sharing our divine heritage as children of the dawning sun.
I am hearing that Oct 28th, marking the end of the Mayan Calendar in some writings, will be a time for great clarity and visioning and understanding of all that has gone before and the fullness of our place and purpose in serving the unfolding of our highest future. I am looking forward tthe vista as we position ourselves for the marvelous splitting of worlds of the 11-11-11
Every ripple of bliss is a cosmic reunion, climbing climbing ever higher, lighting the flame of primal desire, spiraling, spiraling spiraling spiraling ever more toward home!
What a long and surreal night it has been. So much love to all and fortitude for the times to come. See you at the great reunion. And as my dear friend Micheal says, "Every ripple of bliss is a cosmic reunion
Int his time of the undoing of the mental body of tyranny, the way to ecstasy becomes clearer than it has ever been if we can but get our precious sweet feet poised upon the path.
We are holding hands, beloved. Every moment you spend in gratitude and appreciation, I am lifted and we are all lifted until the ground under our spiraling ecstatic feet is the only ground there is, dancing, singing, feasting and sharing our divine heritage as children of the dawning sun.
I am hearing that Oct 28th, marking the end of the Mayan Calendar in some writings, will be a time for great clarity and visioning and understanding of all that has gone before and the fullness of our place and purpose in serving the unfolding of our highest future. I am looking forward tthe vista as we position ourselves for the marvelous splitting of worlds of the 11-11-11
Every ripple of bliss is a cosmic reunion, climbing climbing ever higher, lighting the flame of primal desire, spiraling, spiraling spiraling spiraling ever more toward home!
What a long and surreal night it has been. So much love to all and fortitude for the times to come. See you at the great reunion. And as my dear friend Micheal says, "Every ripple of bliss is a cosmic reunion
May we ever more find our way on the upward spiral of joy and ecstasy and sweet communion with the creative source within, that is the living light. i am always dancing with you there!!!
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