Becoming permeable to the sweet medicine of Love

I came to this life just about as receptive to love as this stone child in the picture at left is to the divine butterfly woman mother attempting to love her.

Shortly after arriving into the womb, sweetness was poured into me, too much sweetness and not only was it not a blessing, it came into me as a poison, a substance that I could not assimilate at all, suffocating me in the dark of night.

Now I see that this very experience set up the task before me in this life, the core journey and mission , to pave the path from the depth of Fear into the height of remembered love.
The task of my life has been to recover my body, mind, spirit vehicle as a nexus point for the giving and receiving of the sweetness of love. To begin with a template where love was vehemently rejected in a reversal grid of tyranny and distortion, owned by the fear maker who inseminated his poison throughout my waking days and my sleeping nights and somehow heal this template into one that was not only permeable to love but would rise as a nexus point for the giving and receiving of love between mother and infant, lover and beloved.

So starting from within this stone in the depth of the night, I would journey across the darkness, building bridges of love in the night for these 27 years and 10 months and through great cleansing and clearing and re- configuring, this would become a vehicle that would not only be permeable to love, but be a nexus point for the giving and receiving of love, an anchor for the self generation of the upward spiral of super conductive fountaining ecstasy of communion with GOD that could serve as a transit bridge for those threatened by the damage of the code enabling their safe passage into the light.

I am understanding now that in order to embody the path from the depth of darkness and fear to the height of Remembered Love, one must live at the effect of the depth of darkness. Of course it makes perfect sense as I think of it: to serve as a transit bridge from decimated genetic code to the fully remembered code of living light as an insurance agent for GOD, enabling the deliverance of the masses on my dance card that I came to take unto the ascension timeline of love. GOD made arrangements for some key insurance agents who would anchor an intact path from the bowels of darkness into the heights of remembered love so that

Even in the depth of night of "final conflict" even those with the most damaged code would be provided safe passage!,

Those of us that serve as transit bridges, would have to be able to have within our DNA, plug-in points even for the most fear-entrenched disintegrated code. In that way, we would be able to serve as in a sense, "universal chargers" no matter how dead the battery, ensuring that the most possible beloved human family has a passage home should the code be deeply damaged.

Anyway, getting back to the poisoning. On august 22nd, for some reason and

looking back I see it was a part of my healing to repeat history with my mama in the house of my birth but on the night of August 22nd, I dumped toxic sweetness into my blood stream once again. She ordered the Chocolate Lava cake from Islands and I went to pick it up. There could be no mistake, this was a parnership operation. We microwaved the brownie so the chocolate was slightly melted, then dished up the ice cream with hot fudge sauce and nuts. It was split 3 ways between my mom, dad and me. The suffocation did not begin until I went to bed. There, I felt my body chemistry in danger as I lived through horrendously anguishing and terrifying spasms of suffocation all through one horrible night and was hung over in dispair and weakness the whole of the next day.

The next day, August 24th, I was scheduled to fly to San Francisco for some sweet visiting time with a new friend. It all felt so wrong to feel so bad. So on the night of August 23rd as I laid down to sleep, I said a prayer. "Please, let love come to me. please let love heal me. Please let my life be lifted from the dungeon of anguish and suffering into the new day of joy, love and well being, of strength and sunshine and celebration. I want to go to visit my friend tomorrow and be smiling and well. She is a new friend, and I want to be alive and well with her and able to experience joy.

Then I slept....

While the body slept this great love began to come surrounding my mid section where I was most hurting and suffocating, It came like a sun, like a flower of immense abundance, pouring Golden light into me. It came re-instructing my cells that I was a being of light, that I was re-membered in the great web of love, that I was a child of the sun, no longer trapped in a night of suffocation and torture, and the newly wounded territory of my adrenals were ripe to hear the message this time and to truly be lifted, healed and made new again.

And whnen I woke in the morning, a new probable future had been opened for me. A day and a visit with my friend in the sunshine of celebration and wellness. I was able to breathe and walk and smile and I went to the airport, got on that plane and did go and did celebrate with my new friend. We sang. We walked in San Francisco. We went to the Peace Arts Cafe. I shared music with her and her husband and it was so good to be in the light.

So I wanted to take this time to report the miracle of this shifting of gears from suffering to celebration.

These times are so amazing. More than ever, we can shape and sculpt and change our reality by our will to receive the good even if we have been suffering for a very long time. The sun is right there for us, if we can just turn our intentions toward letting it reach us.

May we continue to reach with our precious hearts and our precious arms into the dawning sunlight of love and gratitude.

Love to all in my human family and the family of all of life. May we continue to reach with our precious hearts and our precious arms into the dawning sunlight of love and gratitude. Even as chaos and downward spiraling mental bodies all around us come undone, we can anchor ourselves in love and gratitude, in the simplicity of appreciation for the beauty within and without. We can look into each other's eyes and see the dawning sun of our impending return to unity and feel how much we love each other. In this appreciation we rise onto the upward spiral , above the descending chaos and hold ourselves steady in this light. Not only this, as more and more of the mental structures come undone,

Int his time of the undoing of the mental body of tyranny, the way to ecstasy becomes clearer than it has ever been if we can but get our precious sweet feet poised upon the path.

We are holding hands, beloved. Every moment you spend in gratitude and appreciation, I am lifted and we are all lifted until the ground under our spiraling ecstatic feet is the only ground there is, dancing, singing, feasting and sharing our divine heritage as children of the dawning sun.
I am hearing that Oct 28th, marking the end of the Mayan Calendar in some writings, will be a time for great clarity and visioning and understanding of all that has gone before and the fullness of our place and purpose in serving the unfolding of our highest future. I am looking forward tthe vista as we position ourselves for the marvelous splitting of worlds of the 11-11-11

Every ripple of bliss is a cosmic reunion, climbing climbing ever higher, lighting the flame of primal desire, spiraling, spiraling spiraling spiraling ever more toward home!

What a long and surreal night it has been. So much love to all and fortitude for the times to come. See you at the great reunion. And as my dear friend Micheal says, "Every ripple of bliss is a cosmic reunion

May we ever more find our way on the upward spiral of joy and ecstasy and sweet communion with the creative source within, that is the living light. i am always dancing with you there!!!

Findng flight 1923: Earth Fans and Space fans, we are going home!!!!

Hello dear ones,

For $65 more, we could have taken a non stop flight from Portland to Los Angeles but most certainly, the universe had OTHER plans.

Here is how it went on an airline flight experience from hell, re- routing, re-configuring. Now, understanding so much.

On August 14th, we boarded Alaska flight 224 for Sanfrancisco continuing on to Los Angeles where we were headed for a family visit. When we dis-ambarked the airplane in San Francisco is when the real "fun" began. When we arrived, we were fully expecting to go through a gate in the same terminal to make our connection for our continuing flight to Los Angeles. Immediately upon arriving, Frank wanted to go walking. Frank loves to walk, and I love for him to go walking when he wants to, But from the moment that we landed, our communication and mutual nourishment appeared to be cursed. I wanted to eat, he wanted to walk. He said, "Let's go line up and get you food," but even though I need to eat, my priority was to FIND OUR GATE the task is to find flight #1923 SO i KNOW THAT WE KNOW WHERE WE ARE GOING AND WILL BE ASSURED TO MAKE OUR NEXT CONNECTION. FRANK IS ANGRY. HE SAYS HE IS TRAPPED UNLESS I STAY WITH THE BAGS. I WILL HAVE TO HOLD ALL THE BAGS AND GO THROUGH THE FOOD LINE SO HE CAN WALK. I actually feel very happy to do this for him. I actually feel joy that i can provide this service to lighten his load but he cannot receive the gift of my offer. THE ENERGY BETWEEN US IS THE IMPOSSIBILITY FOR MUTUAL NOURISHMENT. THIS IS THE THEME. ONLY NOW DO I HAVE A GRASP AT WHY THIS WAS SO INTENSELY PAINFUL IN MY PSYCHE anyway, That's when I looked up to find that our flight #, #1923, was nowhere to be found on any of the monitors. Flight 1923 was nowhere to be seen on any of the monitors within our view. (Frank actually received 2 different #s for the flight in his paperwork which was adding further confusion) So then frank Left to go walking, and I began to feel deep despair, much deeper than would be warranted by this stimulus-response as a single event, ( Fully immersed in the dream, I was not able to behold it's deeper significance.) Anyway. Next i gathered up the bags and took them through the food line and bought a breakfast burrito.

NEXT FRANK RETURNED WITH A SURPRISED LOOK ON HIS FACE AND INFORMED US THAT WE WOULD HAVE TO LEAVE THIS BUILDING AND ENTER ANOTHER TERMINAL WHERE WE WILL HAVE TO GO THROUGH SECURITY AGAIN TO CATCH OUR NEXT FLIGHT WHICH WILL BE ON AMERICAN, NOT UNITED BUT AMERICAN ( that distinction is important) At this point I WAS kind of in shock, just dumbounded but still having to continue at the effect of this strange ride I was on. Not 5 seconds after eating my half of the breakfast burrito, I was being marshalled to speed walk, traversing this major airport like a heroin in some sci fi adventure plot.

so we continued on, and half way there we found a man with a map, meanwhile frank was trying to remember flight #s and gates that he didn't write down. Frank tells the man thatwe are going to gate 55 in terminal 2 united airlines. The man says, "no wait there is no united airlines in terminal 2. That's in terminal 3." So frank looks at the map, and says, "well I know it was gate 55 ( which has symbology of it's own) and the man says "well are you sure now" Frank says, "Yes" So we look and he sees that, infact, it is American airlines, not united, that will be our vehicle for the flight home. Quickly we proceed to the gate, through a long line of security, I call and complain. The nice woman at Alaska airlines apologizes and says it is in the fine print, "operated by american airlines" tiny purple print amid huge meaningless advertisements distracting our attention. Anyway, she takes our addresses and sends us each extra miles. "I'll send you extra miles for this inconvenience," she says. ( oh boy, I can't wait to see the extra miles divine creator is sending us for this Earthtrip!!!)

Next, feeling like all of our troubles are behind us. We exit security and are now approaching gate 55. At this point, to ad to the utter chaos, the monitor appears to be disobeying the laws of quantumn physics. Looking to see where our flight # should be displayed, there are 3 different #'s flashing alternately. Frank decides since 2 out of 3 of those #s are listed on his printout, that this is good enough. Hell, it is a crap shoot at this point. Next we arrive at gate 55 at American and they are calling for preferred passengers to board. (We were clear, at least, that were not in the preferred group). They are boarding preferred passengers on the right and then group 2 after that. I look at my boarding pass and say, "there's no group 2" What do you mean, group 2? feeling completely disconnected and aborted once again. Then the woman quickly grabs my boarding pass and says, Oh that one's no good, you have to change it for an American one. So she quickly transforms my alaska info into an american boarding pass, and magically it all makes sense "Group 2" right there in big letters. An air of judgment and impatience in her as she hands me the pass as if of course i should have known all this and what's my problem. ( Becca if you are reading this, this was the moment that my planet spirit self joined my previously incarnated self. ) Boarding the airplane I rant at the massive inconvenience of this airport experience. Now I am looking for my assigned seat 25E. ( a fact that I have to explain to Frank because continuing on with the communication FUBAR, he is clueless)
A real bright spot in the entry was seeing the beautiful blue seats and the soothing loving embrace of the blue as if my blue-ray starseed and indigo races were all affirming me as the portal through which I came to this Earth.

Seeing the symbolism:

THE BAGS: The original plan for humanity's ascension was that Mother Gaia would in a sense, carry humanity's luggage so that we could ascend in the easiest way possible. Mother Earth would fully open her stargates of christ grid rememberment and she would carry us up on her body as a great ship of love.

When Frank wanted to go walking free, I was in the position of mother Gaia and the Sirian guardians who had worked out a lovely plan so that Gaia could support Humanity to go free. Gaia would take the luggage of all Humanity's karma upon her wonderfully ample stargates and lift humanity with her own body up into the 5th dimensional New Earth. This is what I was feeling the joy at taking the bags for frank so that he could go fly free or "walk free" in this case. But, this was not how it was going to be. The dark side would play a card that would change everything. They would threaten a pole shift, forcing the guardians to notify Gaia that her stargates would have to be shut down to prevent the total distruction, loss of life and complete disaster for the dream of ascension for humanity and the divine human blueprint, and there would be discension and lack of harmony and neither the Earth nor humanity would have their needs met. As it was when the controllers threatened pole shift, the guardians had to shut down her stargates, and the frontline lightworkers were left with no access to the Christ light support of the inner stargates of Earth which they had always drawn upon up until that point and this was bad news.

for mass humanity and for the one who is writing this, charged with putting together a puzzle from the depths of hell, who had always had, at least the stargates of gaia to call upon, would now be thrown into black orphan destination in the bowels of hell and disconnect! Now Gaias superglue was no longer available. i would have to fashion my own unifying substance through the densist alchemical meeting of light and darkness that i had experienced yet. The way would be much more difficult. a simple ascension from dimensions 3-5 on a new Earth just waiting would now be a reconissance mission in hell, each being having to recover their own stargate system and plow through the full density of their karma. Every man for himself and every light worker forced to kick ass like never before to lighten the way .

All lightworkers would now have to take the place of gaia's stargates to assist humanity. There would be new protocol all around. huge adjustment to the updated mission requirements. ( This corresponds to the moment I looked up and saw that there was no flight listed for us, the original connecting flight home planned for humanity was not going to happen and frank returning to tell us that our flight was in a whole other terminal, and we would have to exit the building we were in, enter a new one, and go through security all over again!!!! All of this providing a very accurate vibrational match of the abortion of timeline A (I am not positive on the dates but I think ascension plan A, ascension through the Earth's stargates, was aborted in august of 2003. )
It wasn't until i had a night's sleep that it all came together and the parallels were downloaded to me that this whole airport experience was enabling the re-enactment.

So it is this morning that I realize, I was enacting the abortion of timeline A, Ascension timeline for humanty and the re-route into Ascension B. Each step of the way, I was confronted with the aborted connection and then was given the required correction to make, to eventually, and finally get myself home to Venice Beach, the place of my birth as Sarah Hope Adams. Of course, frank, as always was my willing companion and assistant in the mission. Interesting to note that he wore turquoise and I wore Violet, the colors of the mother arc and the divine masculine. Frank holding the feminine pole and I the masculine.

The correction into the new terminal and flight

So interesting that the man helped us make the distinction that United and American were NOT the same airline. it's like saying "you might be looking for united, but the flight your on is "American" which is certainly not "United" Of course we know that America is one of the core strongholds of the dark forces playing the role of holding separation consciousness in place!!! and even the gate # 55 corresponds with the 55 reversal grid countering the forces of light and integration on the Earth tht has it's major headquarters in the UK, the motherland of America. this grid damns the connection and curses the connection of the masculine and feminine by promulgating massive distortion fields in the grid of the Earth. (So interesting an appreciated how the props in the dream so beautifully cooperate to tell the story so perfectly. And then being told that my boarding pass, "Birth certificate" this is what it felt like, was not valid. This moment was the second major abortion experience because here we had made it to the terminal, we found the gate, we met the man, we deciphered the confusion; we stood before the gate and still, the connection hadn't been made. Still we we had not been translated into valid existence as I whined "Group 2. What is group 2?" looking at my dog-eared, Alaska boarding pass that had now been through so much to get this far, once again, completely clueless as to how to proceed. The lady in her suit grabs my piece of paper and looks at me with exhasperation saying "This has to be changed to an American Airlines Boarding Pass!" and in a flash, the next correction is made, this arbitrary piece of paper switching has now translated me into a being that is recognizable by the system ( and I am amazed at how fast and simply this transaction is accomplished: In a few seconds she prints me out another boarding pass and this one, miraculously translates me into a recognizable entity in the American airlines system. Amazing!!!!!) One minute invalid, the next minute, POOF, I'm valid. And all it took was a piece of paper! Such amazingly superficial bullshit in a mechanized system of computers and numbers, but I'm in. And since I need that flight home, I get on that plane.

The multiple flight numbers

I find the multiple flight #s all converging and different dependent upon where they flew in from was very interesting and quite symbolic as well. Adding to all the special effects to convey a sense of unstable fields of possiblity where realities were in a state of flux and all was very dreamlike in quality with each # opening a portal into another possibility or even more accurately the idea that these different populations had been on a different flight but now all who belonged on this flight were converging onto the same vehicle regardless of what path they had been on up until this point. Very exciting, this notion of convergence!

Going home

And all of us our routed onto s0me plane now, having incarnated to live underneath the reversal grids of separation consciousness, we grab our heavy luggage and attempt to manuever through this strange circuitous ride delivering us unto ever more surreal landscapes, each one bringing us the opportunity to heal something from the past, to put something right that went wrong, to forgive again and again, to drop from out of our judging minds into our loving hearts until that love mends all mistaken pathways of the mind. And here we are on the verge of ascension with our marvelous Gaia but now having to become our own ascension vehicles as we shed the reversal grids and the myriad communication impediments of separation consciousness and find our way to translate separation consciousness into unity consciousness each step of the way. We must see the disconnects being iluminated and then make the corrections to re-route into the United airlines of love and forgiveness, the United airlines in terminal ( I hate that word) how about immortal love awakening portal 3, as we become the vehicles that can deliver ourselves unto the timeline of loving kindness, of rememberment, of forgiveness of all our faultering blindly, bumbling around under the grip of separation consciousness. To move forward with grace, we must forgive the parts of ourselves that have so skillfully provided this mass hallucination of not love that has governed this planet for nearly 20,000 years.

We are going home, beloved family. We are finding our way. We are making our corrections and we are making our connections. The grace is there helping us. The angels are there holding us, The extra terrestrial star nations and family are urging us on and loving us so supremely delivering us these beautiful messages in our crop fields and hovering over us in their marvelous crafts, watching and waiting for the moments when we will have contact again as the galactic family that we are, having been held under quarantine these thousands of years. So much love to all as we continue this amazing journey. May our flight upward be one of ease, grace and joy in the light of ever-more forgiveness and ever greater union with all that is!!!!! United, here we come!!!!

The land of the in between

For the sake of the timeline of the events that I am aware of I am just going to list them here in a rather jumbled and cliff note kind of a way. If you have any curiousity of these events, I am happy to elaborate, but for now, just time keeping.

In May the descending spirals of the beast technology were actively moving to achieve trigger events and those of us who hold the power to neutralize these fields were put to work in huge ways as the scape goat, Osama Bin Laden was announced to be found and killed in the plot of the controler agendas. This coupled with the Royal wedding, the hyper materialized version of the sacred marriage in England, reptilian central. Then in June huge re-ballancing of the polarities and magnetic field of sun and moon generated influences and the Asian Grid, freeing soul's from the dark syphoning technologies and back into the mother arc that were trapped in the Hiroshima and Nagasaki bombings and other horrors of Asian history. neutralizing descending spirals in Sri Lanka and much of Asia, knocking moon chain beings of the higher astral out of their seats. Then the Sphinx was unified on Summer Solstice as veils were lifted and came it's mighty roar of the ferocious re-,membering great mother lion. A great victory, awakening the great heart chackra of Giza Egypt, and then in July, on July 15th came the healing of the Bohemian Grove darkness and the freeing of the children and on July 16th the freeing of the butterfly. and just a week later on July22nd began a huge dismantling of the mental body at a high level, hitting us in the 2nd and 3rd chackras with major constipation and density affecting these chackras as the mental body was being transmuted and cleared of much lower vibrating identity.

And now here it is August 4th. I would call this the land of the in between. I feel like I am in a major stasis of pregnant pause, spiraling down into unknown voids of ethereal webbing, not yet nit together and the topside me is just hanging out, but the veils feel so thin. My mermaid dolphin self is so close as to join me at the dentist on Wednesday spewing out water all over the place over and over again instead of allowing the suction vacuum to clean up the water. I felt the tangible presence of cetaceans in the room. Music career feels to be at a standstill. NO idea how to bring in any money at all. Time to consult www.howthehelldoIproceed.com. This was a joke of a website that doesn't really exist, but I like to site it when no answers are forth coming. I know when I breathe and feel the love, it all feels good and when I go into my mind, it all turns to pucky!!! So, ho hum, i remain mindless and happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love to all!!!!!!!!