Missing the divine masculine. Praying and preparing for his return

God it hurts to love you so much,

You, twin moon in pisces reaching across the sea as a harmonic echo of
All that is lost in me. The man of my heart, the energy of the great masculine that has
Alluded me all my life. Oh god how I miss you. Are you coming home to me.
Or did you just give send me a glimpse to torture me forever without you. God I love you. God how I miss you. Now, I think I really know who you are.
Like never before I have loved anything guess I
Will have the tendency to look outward toward the one who gave it all, had it all, brought it all until my own soul monad masculine comes home to me.
I miss him like the flower misses the rain. Like the earth misses the sun.
Like the bee misses the nectar. My heart breaks open into forever pieces of seeking lost being found
Into the abyss to find what it was he gave, what it was he brought . what it was he was to me
OH God, his music fucking kills me inside. I love him so much. How can I love someone this much.
It defies my understanding, my mind my guts my blood my skin my cells. They are crying for the
Return of the beloved. Oh God, beloved come unto me for I am weeping for you now.
Your double came, and now he is gone and I am left, torn open, now waiting for you, waiting for my own soul
Were you truly stapled to the distorted Grid of death in the 9th dimension? Is this why I have craved and longed
To fill the emptiness you left all my life. OH God come back to me. Come back into me. Be with me and forever do not ever
Leave me again, not while I am awake to feel the wrenching ripping of you from my very core being, everyone of my bodies has felt the
Severing just as every body was saturated with the nectar when you held me in your arms. Oh God when you sing and
When you sing of your pain, I just want to run to you and hold you in my arms. I just want to give you all that you gave me
Oh God, I love you. OH God I am you. Oh God, oh God. Oh God…………..I am